Meet Me in St Louis

Judy Garland ... Esther Smith

Margaret O'Brien ... 'Tootie' Smith

Mary Astor ... Mrs. Anna Smith

Lucille Bremer ... Rose Smith

Leon Ames ... Mr. Alonzo Smith

Tom Drake ... John Truett

Marjorie Main ... Katie - Maid

Harry Davenport ... Grandpa

June Lockhart ... Lucille Ballard

Henry H. Daniels Jr. ... Lon Smith Jr.

Joan Carroll ... Agnes Smith

If you didn't already notice from my profile... I LOVE classic movies! There is something about that is so much more fantastical and romantic then most modern movies. I have a serious case of hopeless romantic.

The other night I watched one of my all time favorites...Meet Me in St Louis. When I was younger, to the annoyance of my older sister, I was obsessed with this movie. I am pretty sure I watched it at least once a day for the better part of a year!

For those of you that are unfamiliar with the movie, it is the story focuses on a middle class family (The Smiths) that live in St. Louis right at the turn of the century. The whole town is a buzz with the upcoming opening of the World's Fair, and the family faces the emotional possibility of having to move from their beloved St. Louis. Judy Garland plays Esther, a heart sore 17 year old that is in love with John Truett (a young, dreamy Tom Drake) or as the song puts it The Boy Next-door. A brilliant cast, amazing story and an orchestration of beautiful emotion and song!

Often times when I watch this movie I place myself in Esther Smiths shoes. She is in love with a boy that, at first, doesn't even know that she exists...and when they do meet, she does all she can to create opportunity for him to make a move, but he tends to mess up any romantic situations. I can't help but feel her pain, growing up with a fairytale fantasy of how a romance should pan out, and in any attempt to create this fantasy life feels and usually IS completely futile! Yet every time I watch this movie I am swept away in future prospects of romance! I long to be noticed and carried away...OK now I just sound cheesy! But it's true...many, well most girls want, not only to be noticed but, to be swept away, to be loved and cared for by a tall, dark and handsome man (well, that's my type a guy;)) It's the want and need to feel the approval from a man. It's part of our little womanly curse!

"...Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."

Genesis 3:16b

Yeah, so if you haven't guessed I am not an overly liberal woman. Yes, I think that women should be their own person and even have an awesome career...that is not what I am talking about! No matter how independent a woman is... her emotions are wired this way! This is a "Man's World", yes we are equal in brilliance and thought but face it ladies...God made us the gentler sex. As a very free thinking, independent, single woman in 2009, this can be a constant struggle because it is not in some of us to come off as the helpless damsel in distress! But if you are anything like me... you don't want to wear the pants in a relationship... a man needs to be a MAN!! This actually gives you a chance to feel girly and not like you have to be the domineering, decisive one!

One of my favorite scenes in that movie is when Esther comes to John's porch to apologize for the previous scene, when she attempted to beat him up for supposedly hitting her little sister Trudy. Of course He didn't do anything of the sort...Trudy fibbed to get out of trouble. But anyhow Esther apologizes, and proceeds to leave but John tries to make up an excuse for her to stay a moment more...and just as she is sadly about to leave... he grabs her by the arms and kisses her! Shocked in the best way, she looks at him and says "You know you have an awful strong grip...for a boy!" smiles, but still flustered runs back to her house!

The moment is priceless in one instant, caught up in strength and love!! ~sigh~ Sounds great!!! Sadly I have yet to meet my John Truett, but I do think that he is out there!! I am not the most patient person in the world but I know he is worth the wait!!

one more step... to growing up!

Often times throughout my life I have found moments that I feel like I have to be very grown-up. Some of these moments seem perfectly natual, some caused by unwelcome outside forces in which I feel that I am in a helpless situation and I can either grow up and bear it... or take it like a child and just simply curl up on the floor and cry. I am an adult and want to be able to handle whatever situation "like a big girl" but at times this seems like an all too difficult task.

Well, once again God and life are presenting me with a chance to step out on my own and be a grown-up... My older sister Lysha and my brother-in-law Christopher have lived in about ten minutes away from me for the last couple of years...Lysha and I are really close… so it’s been great! We see each other when we want and we are always there when we need someone who really understands us...we defiantly have our own lives but we are a part of each other's.

Within this last month or so both of our lives have been changed. On July 16th Lysha gave birth to my beautiful niece Zoey Kay. She is a beautiful joy and I am so happy to be a part of her life. However a small hitch... Lysha and Chris have been wanting to move to Rapid City, SD (the town Lysha and I spent a good portion of childhood in) and now God has made a way...Lysha got a job as a 3rd and 4th grade teacher at the private school in our home church...my mom is a teacher there and both my little sisters attend. It's a great job and a great opportunity for Lysha. Plus they will be close to our parents... Chris's parents are even talking about moving out here to be close to them...I think this really is a God thing and I am so excited about the possibilities for them.

I can't help feeling sad that I can't see them whenever I want. Now every time I see my niece she will have grown a lot and she may not even recognize me!! Since I moved to Eugene, Lysha and Chris's has been my refuge...the place I go when I feel like I can't handle things or I just need to chill out! That place is now gone!

On the other hand this is it... I am a young woman on my own… independent of legal family ties and no immediate family to look over my shoulder.

I can't help feeling like a small child that longs and loves the independence given her however when the going gets tough, there is nothing more that I want to do then run to my big sis or mom and get some good advice!! My family has always been super close and now I feel so separated!

I know this is going to be really hard! And I know that with God's help I will be ok! I have amazing friends and extended family that are so supportive...thank God!!!

Dear Jesus,

Once again I am placing myself in your hands! I trust you! Help me in my own weakness! Let me find comfort when I am lonely and refuge in your love and peace! Thank you for all that you are and for what you are doing in my life and the lives of my family members!! I love you!!

Amen

Zoey Kay Doss taken by Seth Magee

Starshine Greeting!!!...My response to the Earth

Well hello to all you out there!! Wherever the proverbial "out there" is... so...if no one minds I'm going to ramble for a few seconds... (Ha-ha you're not going to stop me!! even if you wanted to... it's my blog!!) This blog is meant for really whoever and whatever.... I will be posting my thoughts! Crazy, dull, deep or silly! This is to get me actually writing!! So comment, enjoy and give a little opinion!